Happy Tuesday! I want to share a little update on how everything’s going with me, with Cammi, when it’s due to launch, and what’s next. But also about a chronic illness I live with, and how that's been getting in the way.
Content Warning: Chronic Illness, Near–death experiences
Many people won’t know this, but I have a serious, life-threatening heart condition. It’s genetic, and it’s going to keep getting worse over time. The only treatments available today are about managing the condition and slowing its progression, and keeping me alive.
The condition causes arrhythmias – dangerous rhythms like ventricular tachycardia (VT) and ventricular fibrillation (VF). VT is a fast but organised rhythm that can sometimes resolve on its own, or can progress into VF. VF is chaotic and lethal if untreated. I have an implantable cardiovascular defibrillator (ICD), which monitors my heart and delivers a variety of different treatments to help get my heart back into a normal rhythm. It's incredibly effective and it has saved my life multiple times.
I first became aware of this condition around fifteen years ago, when I woke up in hospital. I'd had VF and come very close to dying. Fortunately, while serious, it is a manageable condition. The management worked well at the time, and for over a decade I had very few issues. But over the past couple of years, the episodes of VT started increasing. First every day, then sometimes multiple times a day. Last year, some weren’t being treated properly, lasting hours, and I needed to go to the hospital three times.
I was put on a waiting list for an ablation — a procedure where damaged cells in the heart are destroyed to stop the arrhythmias. I had the surgery last summer, but was told my heart had significant scarring. Where most people are told an ablation will help for 5–10 years, I was promised one year. And then, just eight months later, I started feeling VT again.
This weekend I had nine episodes. Three of them were back-to-back. My ICD treated all of them, but it’s incredibly frightening. Each time, I don’t know if it’ll stop, or continue or get worse and go into VF. I’m waiting to hear back from my cardiology team. Most likely, I’ll have to increase my meds, or add/switch to something stronger. These medications block chemical reactions in the heart, but they affect the rest of the body too — and they come with risks like liver or kidney damage. As I said: management.
So why am I sharing this?
Because I want to talk about where Cammi is. Being an entrepreneur, as well as a solo product designer and developer — means facing a massive learning curve. I’ve definitely felt that, even with all my years in product companies. And it’s normal. For a lot of people, it’s already enough of a barrier to entry. I’ve been going through that curve too while also dealing with my Heart, Surgery, Recovery, and a period of depression as I came to terms with how bad my heart has gotten.
And yet... I’ve still grown. Cammi is looking better than ever. Testing with users better than ever. I set out on a six-week mission to get Cammi launched. It was a fantastic burst of energy — fun, focused, and full of promise. But we didn’t quite make it. Some key things fell behind, and a collaborator wasn’t able to deliver a crucial piece, so I had to start from scratch. I was gutted when I missed the launch date. It really took the wind out of me. And just as I was trying to recover from that, my heart issues stopped being managed.
I’ve tried to set a new four-week milestone for launch, but I just can’t guarantee I’ll be able to do the work. A lot of the work I *have* done has needed a lot more support, like pairing to help me bridge the motivation gap. I’m still committed to launching Cammi but I don’t know exactly when that will be.
And the truth is, I’m also running out of money. This has added more stress (as well as motivation). Launching Cammi and earning some income from it is more important then ever, now. I’m hopeful it’ll happen soon.
Once it does, my plan is to support the product and find my first 100 customers. If it’s successful, I’ll stay focused on it full-time. If it’s more of a slow burn, I’ll continue part-time while diversifying my income.
I’d love to be a fractional Rails developer for mission-driven companies, make videos about my solopreneur journey, release a cookbook, work on other app ideas I’ve had bubbling for years, and maybe even sell some Notion templates. But all of that relies on my heart condition being properly managed again.
I’d like to start talking more openly about my heart condition. I've always struggled because often talk of this is distressing for other people and I end up supporting them more than they support me. But I want to start shifting that. Sharing this is about educating people on what invisible disability can look like, and hopefully finding others like me, and perhaps even support.
I hope this post can serve as the bedrock of future posts, where I can talk openly about everything that I have to go through to get things done, rather than keeping them somewhat hidden because it's easier.
Content Warning: Chronic Illness, Near–death experiences
Many people won’t know this, but I have a serious, life-threatening heart condition. It’s genetic, and it’s going to keep getting worse over time. The only treatments available today are about managing the condition and slowing its progression, and keeping me alive.
The condition causes arrhythmias – dangerous rhythms like ventricular tachycardia (VT) and ventricular fibrillation (VF). VT is a fast but organised rhythm that can sometimes resolve on its own, or can progress into VF. VF is chaotic and lethal if untreated. I have an implantable cardiovascular defibrillator (ICD), which monitors my heart and delivers a variety of different treatments to help get my heart back into a normal rhythm. It's incredibly effective and it has saved my life multiple times.
I first became aware of this condition around fifteen years ago, when I woke up in hospital. I'd had VF and come very close to dying. Fortunately, while serious, it is a manageable condition. The management worked well at the time, and for over a decade I had very few issues. But over the past couple of years, the episodes of VT started increasing. First every day, then sometimes multiple times a day. Last year, some weren’t being treated properly, lasting hours, and I needed to go to the hospital three times.
I was put on a waiting list for an ablation — a procedure where damaged cells in the heart are destroyed to stop the arrhythmias. I had the surgery last summer, but was told my heart had significant scarring. Where most people are told an ablation will help for 5–10 years, I was promised one year. And then, just eight months later, I started feeling VT again.
This weekend I had nine episodes. Three of them were back-to-back. My ICD treated all of them, but it’s incredibly frightening. Each time, I don’t know if it’ll stop, or continue or get worse and go into VF. I’m waiting to hear back from my cardiology team. Most likely, I’ll have to increase my meds, or add/switch to something stronger. These medications block chemical reactions in the heart, but they affect the rest of the body too — and they come with risks like liver or kidney damage. As I said: management.
So why am I sharing this?
Because I want to talk about where Cammi is. Being an entrepreneur, as well as a solo product designer and developer — means facing a massive learning curve. I’ve definitely felt that, even with all my years in product companies. And it’s normal. For a lot of people, it’s already enough of a barrier to entry. I’ve been going through that curve too while also dealing with my Heart, Surgery, Recovery, and a period of depression as I came to terms with how bad my heart has gotten.
And yet... I’ve still grown. Cammi is looking better than ever. Testing with users better than ever. I set out on a six-week mission to get Cammi launched. It was a fantastic burst of energy — fun, focused, and full of promise. But we didn’t quite make it. Some key things fell behind, and a collaborator wasn’t able to deliver a crucial piece, so I had to start from scratch. I was gutted when I missed the launch date. It really took the wind out of me. And just as I was trying to recover from that, my heart issues stopped being managed.
I’ve tried to set a new four-week milestone for launch, but I just can’t guarantee I’ll be able to do the work. A lot of the work I *have* done has needed a lot more support, like pairing to help me bridge the motivation gap. I’m still committed to launching Cammi but I don’t know exactly when that will be.
And the truth is, I’m also running out of money. This has added more stress (as well as motivation). Launching Cammi and earning some income from it is more important then ever, now. I’m hopeful it’ll happen soon.
Once it does, my plan is to support the product and find my first 100 customers. If it’s successful, I’ll stay focused on it full-time. If it’s more of a slow burn, I’ll continue part-time while diversifying my income.
I’d love to be a fractional Rails developer for mission-driven companies, make videos about my solopreneur journey, release a cookbook, work on other app ideas I’ve had bubbling for years, and maybe even sell some Notion templates. But all of that relies on my heart condition being properly managed again.
I’d like to start talking more openly about my heart condition. I've always struggled because often talk of this is distressing for other people and I end up supporting them more than they support me. But I want to start shifting that. Sharing this is about educating people on what invisible disability can look like, and hopefully finding others like me, and perhaps even support.
I hope this post can serve as the bedrock of future posts, where I can talk openly about everything that I have to go through to get things done, rather than keeping them somewhat hidden because it's easier.